True Crimes Against Wine

Topher answers a listener question about why wines are different colors, and explains to Rachel the various reasons behind pigmentation and what colors can tell you about what you are drinking.

DEFENDANT: Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson

 

EVIDENCE: Teremano Blanco Small Batch Tequila

 

SCENE OF THE CRIME: Jalisco Highlands, Mexico

--

In this VERY SPECIAL LIQUOR EPISODE, our Judges jet to the sun-drenched agave hills of Mexico, where they learn about how a time-honored spirit is crafted, Canadian wrestling dynasties, and the subtle art of sperglary.

--

***WARNING: The audio depicts aggressive cocktail shaking. Please join us in a celebratory dance during these portions of the episode, and remember to check the comments on Instagram and Facebook for the recipes***

 

 

Topher helps guide Rachel through the differences and similarities between organic and biodynamic wines, but Rachel remains skeptical.

DEFENDANT: Madonna

 

EVIDENCE: Ciccone Vineyard American Gewurtztraminer, 2019

 

SCENE OF THE CRIME: Leelanau Peninsula, Michigan, USA

--

Our judges road trip to a tiny, remote winery in the Midwest, where they discuss new product designs, who is getting Judge Rachel in the divorce, and the combat prowess of one of the biggest icons of our generation.

Rachel revisits a question about vegan wine and Topher explains the ins and outs, from production to packaging.

--

This episode is dedicated to the memory of April.

DEFENDANT: Nicole Scherzinger

 

EVIDENCE: Anti-Party Red, 2019

 

SCENE OF THE CRIME: Walla Walla, Washington

--

Our Judges sojourn to the hidden deserts of Washington, where they drunkenly discuss feminist theory, celebrity impersonations, and issue a passionate Mario Kart challenge. Rachel tricks Topher into making a shocking confession.

Our judges answer a question about wine flavors and explain how to get the most out of your wine at home.

DEFENDANT: Fergie

 

EVIDENCE: Ferguson Crest Red Blend "Fergalicious" 2014

 

SCENE OF THE CRIME: Santa Ynez Valley, CA

--

Our judges find themselves trapped in the colorful but dangerous world of 90's pop groups and 2000's mainstream hip-hop as they try to navigate royal imposters, misleading band names, and where to relieve themselves.

DEFENDANT(S): Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie

 

EVIDENCE: Miraval Rosé

 

SCENE OF THE CRIME: Provence, France

--

Our Judges make a return trip to sun-soaked Provence to check on their property and sip on some new evidence. Rachel flexes her ESP while munching a garlicky snack, and Topher waxes poetic about medieval esthetics. 

DEFENDANT: Sting

 

EVIDENCE: Il Palagio Roxanne Rosso Toscana

 

SCENE OF THE CRIME: Tuscany, Italy

--

Our judges jaunt out to the sun-drenched hills of Tuscany, where they sample an ancient red grape, discuss family lineages, and ponder such deep questions as, "How much wine is too much?"